Well friends for the first time in my nearly 15 year relationship with the intarwebs, today I am disappointed. Two days ago news broke that Ken Macha had penciled in Jeff Suppan as the Brewers #5 starter. So I was down. Then yesterday came news that Doug Melvin had locked in Yovani Gallardo for a 5 year deal that keeps here until 2015. So I was up. I evened out so to speak. So while I was plotting this blog out I was trying to think of a video that could accompany the Brewers keeping their fans on an even keel. And of course the first thing that popped into my head is the Seinfeld episode where Jerry is, according to Kramer, Even Steven. So I said to myself, "Jon," I said, "this should be easy enough, you've used Seinfeld clips in nearly every blog you've written in the past year, just hit up youtube, grab the video, and then focus on not ruining a Seinfeld episode with you blah blag blahing." The only problem was that video apparently does not exist on the internet. I tried youtube. I tried google. Wikipedia. Hulu. Nope, negatory, nada, try again. I even tried 90 different ways of searching it,

"seinfeld even steven"

"seinfeld everything even out"

"kramer calls jerry even steven"

"brewers/cubs ticket specials"

"jerry loses a gig at one place then immediately gets a gig at a new place prompting kramer to call him even steven"

Okay so the Brewers one snuck in there and I may have gotten too wordy on the last one but you get the point. I even searched to the 4th "o" page on google and nothing. Just other Seinfeld clips and a library of the Disney show "Even Steven." I knew at some point in my life Shia Labeuof would screw me! So after spending 17 full minutes scouring the internet the best I could do was find the episode script. I guess it is in the 'opposite' episode where George does the opposite of every instinct. So in a way the even steven thing probably gets lost. Bonus word: boo.

PS: This Gallardo thing really is a big deal. Braun and Yovani both locked in until 2015. We essentially bought 5 championships. Memo to Prince: duplicate this process. Please. Also Jeff Suppan must have some kind of behind the scenes dirt on Ken Macha. Only explanation as to how that guy continues to get starts. Maybe he'll turn it around this y.....bwahahaha....I couldn't even type the whole thing.

PPS: My original title for this was going to be "Hey-YO." I could have won a Pulitzer in the 1930's for headline writing.