
As a preface: Are these supposed to be the characters associated with the Tiger, Wolf, and Bear patches? Looks a lot like Tony the Tiger and Smokey the Bear to me. If I'm their lawyers I'm calling shenanigans on this right away. Public service or not, if you don't have your identity what do you have?
Man, talk about being born in the wrong time period. Back in my day we had to excercise, learn how to make fire with two sticks, and compete in triathlons! Alright that last one was a lie, but I honestly don't remember a third thing I had to complete in Cub Scouts. In fact I just googled 'cub scout badges,' got to the Cub Scout website, couldn't find what I was looking for in 2 minutes, and gave up. Maybe that's why I never got my Webelos badge? Whateves. But now this article comes out:
http://gizmodo.com/5526230/cub-scouts-give-up-entirely-offer-video-game-badge
Video Games=Cub Scout badge. Or pin. Or whatever the heck it's called these days. Honestly are the Cub Scouts serious with this? Like if I could be racking up badges by dominating Mario Kart and owning my friends at Star Fox then I'd be an Eagle Scout so fast it would make your head spin! Just a shame I'm past by Cub Scout prime at this point. Who knew that while I was playing Oregon Trail when I was 8 instead of doing pushups to get my 'athletic' pin I was acutally setting precedents for generations behind me. On a sidenote no one plays Oregon Trail as effectively as me. No one. Set that pace to grueling and make your wife the name of the girl you've got a crush on and blamo, game on. That plus you've got to be hearltess. Oh Dan's got typhoid? Pffft. Whatever man, then don't drink the old water, now quiet down while I go kill 72 buffalo.
I do have to say there is one thing on the list of accomplishments you have to achieve in order to get this badge that I do think is intense:
4. Teach an adult or a friend how to play a video game.
Thank god they added the 'friend' part, because anyone who has tried to teach an adult how to play Playstation knows it is a test of wills. Like I've got a better chance of guessing what's on a woman's mind than I do of teaching my dad how to throw a pass in Madden. Bonus word: game.
PS: Without a doubt my generation is going to be best equipped to survive in the event of a zombie apocalypse. I've played so many hours of Resident Evil it's not even funny. Just need enough ink ribbons to save my checkpoints and I'll survive till I'm 80.
PPS: Before I put this link up I need to warn you. Disclaimer: By clicking on this link you forfeit the rest of your work day. Because there's not a chance you're getting anything else done once you see it. The guy who developed this is 200% the guy who wrote the rules and regulations to this Cub Scout badge. Enjoy.


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