From the AP (9 times out of 10 this says 'From ESPN'....this is the 1):
SHEBOYGAN, Wis. - A Wisconsin woman is accused of biting off her husband's tongue as he was giving her a good night kiss.
Sheboygan police say the man in his late 70s called authorities about 11 p.m. Monday, but was having trouble speaking. An ambulance was dispatched to the house.
Sgt. Terry Meyer says the husband and wife were singing Christmas carols when paramedics arrived. Meyer says the woman, in her late 50s, threw a coffee cup at them.
The man was taken to a Sheboygan hospital and then transferred to Froedtert Memorial Lutheran Hospital in the Milwaukee area where he was to have his tongue reattached.
Polices say the man didn't want his wife arrested. But, she was taken into custody on possible charges of mayhem and domestic violence.
Yawn. If I've said it once I've said it a thousand times, whatever you do, be the absolute BEST at what you do. And in Sheboygan we do classless stories the way Picasso paints pretty pictures. Like I wasn't even phased by this the first time I heard it this morning. Tell this tongue guy to get in line behind drunken youtube videos of our mayor, dogs frozen to sidewalks, the chick who stripped to avoid a DUI arrest, and the guy blaming a Jack Daniels steak for his breathalyzer fail. Just another day ending in 'y' here folks. Move along, nothing to see.
I do have to say it's pretty safe to assume that no matter how bad your day is it's not going to be as bad as this guy's. Like yeah you've got a board room meeting or important trial coming up that you're unprepared for, but at least you didn't get your tongue bit off right? Life's all about perspective isn't it? I will admit as well that I'm anxious to find out the REST of this story. Like I'm not a crime scene investigator or anything but I've watched enough Law and Order to know that something is missing from the story here. I can't imagine this goes from singing Christmas Carols together, to a kiss goodnight, to a tongue being bitten off. I mean there's got to be a gap there right?