With a title like that how can you not read? One of the philosophies I lived by my entire life: I'll read any article that contains 'Brewers,' 'Packers,' 'Bucks,' or 'farts.' And yes, I was giggling like a school girl just typing 'fart blanket' in to the title section of our blog system.
So to quote Don King: Only in America!! Honestly this is what makes this country great. You've got an idea to solve the worlds bed farting problems? Boom, make it happen and become a gagillionare. Let me also say that this invention is 100% legit. I called the number and everything. In fact all you have to do is google "The better.." and the first thing google fills in for you is '...marriage blanket.'
This is also going to put an end to divorce in this country as we know it. Because you can talk till you're blue in the face about household responsibilities, cheating, blah blah blah. But we all know the #1 reason that couples break up is under the cover farting. It's a fact. So put the inventor of this product next to Thomas Edison, Benjamin Franklin, and whoever invented the Shamwow. They all changed the world in their own little way.
My only question is how extensive was the testing done on this blanket before it made it to the streets. Are we talking you average, every day run of the mill fart? Or like extraordinary circumstances farts. Because Thursday's at college was not only 'thirsty' Thursday's, but taco night at our cafeteria. You get a floor full of guys loaded up on refried beans and PBR and you're talking a different breed of fart. If the better marriage blanket can hold up to that, then I'll buy 10 right now. Maybe that's where the 'same type of fabric used by the military to protect against chemical weapons' comes into play? Because make no mistake about it, thirsty taco Thursday was more dangerous than mustard gas.
I also love at the :41 second mark: "So whether you or your spouse suffers from a health issue..." Ahhhh.....the ol' I have a health issue excuse. As old as time itself. Bonus word: blanket.
PS: This video can cut the crap with the 'you or your spouse' rhetoric. We know this is solely intended for men. Girls don't fart. It's science.
PPS: As happy as couples are about this, dry cleaners have to be equally horrified right? Imagine Bill and Susie walk into your dry cleaning establishment with two weeks worth of gas locked into this thing and you have to clean it. Barf.


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