VS  

I have to admit I saw this question posed on on my buddy's facebook wall like three weeks ago and it's been torturing my mind ever since. Like I've got excel spreadsheets and visual aides at my apartment comparing and contrasting who means more to their team. I even broke out those markers that come with that 'white' marker, and when you use that over colors that are already down it changes it to something else? Stuff is ridiculous. Anyhow the obvious answer here would be Aaron Rodgers based on the fact that he is a quarterback, the team relies on him more blah blah blah. But I'm thinking like overall. In terms of not only athletic prowess on the field, but marketing, celebrity factor, all of that. So let's do this the only way I know how, make a pros and cons list. I=a girl.

As a quick sidenote can anyone see what the hell Ryan Braun is doing in the photo? Like he's got a pool ball maybe? And his arm is on fire? I thought it was one of those magic eye things at first but I can't tell?

Ability on the field (underlined AND bold baby!)

We're certainly comparing apples to oranges when you look at baseball and football. Obviously the Packers are more reliant on Rodgers than the Brewers are on Braun. With that being said though, Braun's name is consistently in comparative conversations with Albert Pujols based on his stats and his age. Aaron Rodgers on the other hand is already is one of the top 3 or 4 quarterbacks in the league (as objectively voted upon by me), has a career QB rating well over 90, and draws comparisons to the Steve Young's of the world. I guess I'd have to give it to Rodgers on the fact that if he gets hurt the Packers are screwed and if Braun gets hurt the worst the happens is Jody Gerut gets extensive playing time......on second thought. Still: Advantage Rodgers.

Marketability

Braun has got to be the clear cut winner here. He's got endorsements with Nike, opened two restaurants in the state, has a shirt brand and a killer faux hawk. Rodgers I'm sure has jersey and show contracts but beyond that not much. How does this guy not have a championship belt endorsement deal? Advantage: Braun.

Celebrity

Aaron Rodgers has been making the rounds on TMZ with photos of him dating Lady Antebellum lead singer Hillary Scott:

Which on normal day would be a lay up drill win for A-Rod. But then I found this:

That's what we like to call a walk off ladies and gentleman! Game over man, game over. I need like 8 of these Remington whateverthehell they are things right now! And here's another thing I love about Braunie. He 200% is taking that hit seriously at the end. I don't care if it's a commercial or a wild card clinching 2 run bomb, Braun plays for keeps. Advantage: Braun.

Winner: Ryan Braun? I guess Rodgers should get like two points for winning the only category that matters in terms of athletics. But then we're back to square one. This is like when Ryu and Ken battle in Street Fighter*. Double knockout. Bonus word: perplexed.

* Anyone who chose to use Ryu or Ken in Street Figher when playing against their friends is a certified jerk. Like my dog could win a fight with those guys. Just haduken the crap out of your opponent and they've got no chance. Why don't you act like a professional for once and try to win with Dhalsim or something.

PS: Just writing this article makes me jealous of professional athletes. Too bad I hit my athletic peak at age 8. There wasn't a thing I couldn't catch during Nerf football at recess in 3rd grade. Hell I could even catch the orange and black Nerf ball that had that plastic screamer on the side. Remember that thing? My hands stung so bad after a half an hour using it that I couldn't even eat my Gushers before we had to go back in. Oh well I guess.