After Arachnophobia I couldn't look at a spider without screaming like a 10 year old girl. After The Matrix, I thought I could could jump in between tall buildings. After Gone in 60 Seconds I thought my Dodge Neon could go as fast as a Shelby Mustang. After Waterworld I was just disappointed. The point is I've always been more of a literal guy (read:gullible) when it comes to real life imitating movie life. But this guy is 200% the character that Harry Doyle was based off of in the movie Major League. This rant is epic! Literally no Cleveland Indian is left out. I think he even got me toward the end. And I've called games for many sports teams in my day. Without a doubt the hardest part of calling games is being critical in a 'nice' way on the air so that Joe Fan thinks you're credible, but the players and managers that you are traveling with don't stop talking to you/give you a wedgie before every game. So I guess this is why he decided to roast everyone? That way they were all treated equally?

Bar none though my favorite part of this video is from the 1:35-2:00 minute mark. Just brilliant broadcasting. I'm talking hall of fame, boom goes the dynamite stuff. Like I want to make a shirt with the Suppan 37 on the back in Brewers blue, that says "I'm hurting all over my bod-ay, head tah toe," on the front. In fact could you imagine if this guy did sports talk in Milwaukee after a Suppan start? What an unmitigated disaster that would be. The producer would have to have his trigger finger on the bleep button the entire time! Bonus word: doyle. Also I guess this goes to show you, that no matter how bad Wisconsin sports may seem, at least we're not in Cleveland:

PS: Jody Gerut hit for the cycle on Saturday? And Jeff Suppan had a scoreless inning yesterday? Like this is the real world right? Not a science fiction novel? Question mark?