Bobby V to Crew?

Posted by Jon Henseler on

Alright I realize I'm about 2 days late on this report, which in internet time may as well be 12 years, but that Charlie Chaplin video freakeds me out yesterday (still), and that FAU announcer video made me lol so I'm a little late to the game. I mean what's more important, time travel or the Brewers next manager? Anyway a report surfaced Wednesday that there is a 'deal in place' to bring in Bobby Valentine/Groucho Marx to manage the Crew in 2011. Keep in mind though that 'deal in place' apparently means 'deal in place without any financial agreement,' so I'm not sure how that's really a deal at all, but whatever, minor details apparently. Regardless of whether this report has any truth to it, this would be a major coup for Doug Melvin and company on a couple of different levels. First of all Valentine has actual experience managing in the NL which Ken Macha did not. Valentine won an NL pennant which Macha did not (in the AL or NL). Valentine has a career winning percentage of .510. Macha has a.....career winning percentage...... of .541. Well 2 out of 3 ain't bad. Not to mention Valentine has a fake mustache on hand so he can get back into games he gets kicked out of while Macha was never once spotted with a fake mustache on. Game, set, match Valentine. Everyone knows fake mustache is the trump card. Everyone. It's like throwing down an Ace in War. No coming back from it. 

On top of all of that he's a manager that has some moxy, some attitude, some....moxy. I need to read more books. The point is he is the polar opposite of Grandpa Macha. Of course a highlighter would have more energy than Macha. Especially one of those highlighters that has multiple different colors all in one. It's like four highlighters in one highlighter. Friggin science. What will they think of next! The sticking point here though is that it sounds like he wants a 3 year deal worth 10 million, which is a little steep for a team that already needs to find some deals on quality pitching. And depending on what happens with Fielder, Melvin is going to be a tad thin on money to begin with. Like we need to shop at Aldi for filet mignon. So we'll see what happens, my guess is whenever the World Series ends they'll either name Valentine or Bob Melvin manager. 

PS: I'm not really sure how a highlighter works in that analogy but it was the closest thing to me in the studio while I was typing this. It was either the highlighter or the hand sanitizer, and I think even Macha has more pizazz than hand sanitizer. Sure the sanitizer may know when to make a pitching change more than Macha but whateves. 

Doulble PS: Nothing is better than finding a deal on name brands at Aldi. Nothing. 

Comments