(hot dogging) (get it?)
(Luc and Hank melting hearts and stealing your girlfriend)
(keep Yo away from the keg Hank)
(better hands than Rickie at 2nd)
(chillin' with a Molitor fathead)(also: hey girl, I've got a nice seafood dinner with your name on it if my
dad boss let's me borrow his Mastercard....think about it)
So in case you're some sort of lunatic who enjoys 7 months of subzero temperatures and haven't been looking forward to spring training, this is Hank, the stray dog who is absolutely crushing spring training. Apparently Hank just wandered into Maryvale one day with a Sarah McLaughlin song playing behind him and the team has basically adopted him. Sounds like if no one claims him he's on his way North at the end of spring training to live with some players or crash at Bernie's chalet. Either way this has to be a good omen for us right? Like last year's spring training started with Doug Melvin getting bit by a scorpion that was hanging out in his show like it was the Boo Box. After that it was a landslide of injuries, suspension and 74 wins. This year we get a pup that I just want to hug the crap out of and who is making everyone smile while dominating the news headlines. I'm not saying Hank is the reason we'll win the World Series but in a different way he totally is.
PS: Hank>Clark the Cub. Bro put some pants on we're trying to run a society here.