Katie Ledecky balancing a glass of chocolate milk on her head while swimming the entire length of the pool is insanity.

Live look at me watching this video 37 times in a row:

Cancel the Olympics! Give her all of the gold medals! Swimming! Track! Break Dancing! All of them!

I’m mostly out of my depth (Yeah? Yeah?? Ahh.) when it comes to the Olympics, but I do know that Ledecky is one of the most decorated Olympic athletes of all time. She’s an absolute missle in the pool. I’m sure there are plenty of Olympic level swimmers that can turn similar tricks as a part of their training routines, but this kind of blew my mind. I don’t think I could balance an empty glass on my head for more than 3 seconds on dry land. I would probably drown instantly if I attempted what she was able to accomplish in that video. Just goes to show you that internet bloggers aren’t as gifted athletically as you may think. I hate to shatter those illusions, but it’s true.

Now my wife a YUGE Olympics fan. She can’t wait for them to get cranked up. Before I met her I could count on one hand the Olympic moments that I remembered. The ’92 Dream Team, Kerri Strug sticking the landing with a shattered ankle, Michael Johnson’s gold shoes in Atlanta in 1996. That’s it. But she can rattle off just about every winner of every event in her lifetime. Once the games start on July 26th, it will be the only on in our house until the closing ceremonies.

PS: We were watching the trials this weekend, Simone Biles on her first turn, what in the blue hell was that:

Issac Newton’s brain is in a pretzel watching that.

Double PS: Break dancing is an official sport this year! I hope the events look like this: